I need your love
by MaryAuksi
Summary: Set in season 4. When something bad happens, can Jay help her? Jemma. Reviews are appreciated!
1. Dead?

**A/N: So, let me fill in. Emma and Jay have been hooking up since Sean left. There was no gonorrhea. Alex and Jay broke up before the hook-ups. Now that something bad happens, can Jay help Emma?**

_Disclaimer- I own nothing but this story._

**Chapter 1: Dead?**

Emma was running to the only place she could feel different. As she tried to catch her breath, stop her crying and talk at the same time, the guy who was holding her close got absolutely no information. While trying to understand at least one sentence from what she was telling, he wiped away the streaming tears just to get even more of them. He tried to tell her to calm down but she must've not listened because all she did was cry even more and choke more words, or mumbles, out of her mouth. He finally made her sit on the bench, telling her he'll be back. As a response, he got a tight grip and nails tugging into his arm. He sighed. „Do you want anything to drink?"

„NO!" She shouted. „Stay."

„Emma." He sat down next to her. „What happened?"

„I told you!" She was now calmed down. „They shot her."

„Shot who?"

„My mom." Her eyes teared up again. „A-and in the hospital sh-she..." _Died_. He got it.

„What about Simpson?" He suddenly asked. Emma looked up at him. What about Simpson? 

„He... He's at home." Emma muttered. „Is that all you care about? What about _Simpson_?!"

„God, no, I hate the guy!" He raised his voice just to understand how scared and little Emma Nelson was already. He kissed the girl gently. „I care about _you_."

„Jay." Emma whispered. „What am I going to do?" The boy didn't know what to say. He didn't even know what to do with his own life. Emma knew she wouldn't get an answer. „Take me home." She only pleaded. Jay looked at her while getting up from the bench. He had to try and help the girl.


	2. How?

**A/N: Hey guys! I know I've learned to NOT plead for reviews, but come on! Only one? This makes me as a writer pretty sad. But, at least SOMEONE's reviewing :) Anyone who reads my Palex story, here's something for you: I can't update while I'm here, in Kärdla, because the story is in my Pärnu computer. I'm REALLY sorry! The next update will hopefully be on 23rd June. But for now, enjoy this new Jemma!**

_Disclaimer- I own nothing but this story._

**Chapter 2: How?**

Jay Hogart was in his car, waiting for the funeral to end. He had no right to go in. He didn't even know Emma's mom's name. He straightened as he saw the crying blonde coming out of the building with the help of her best friend, Manny Santos. This wasn't the best time to meet the other girl, but if he wanted to see Emma, he knew he'd also have to see Manny. The Filipino girl curiously looked over to him as he got out of his bright orange car. Jay saw Manny and Emma talk about something. Manny left. „I'm sorry." He whispered to her ear as she hugged him tight. He still didn't know who had shot her. From what he had heard it was some robber at the mall. „Do you need a ride home?"

„Not home." She said quickly.

„Emma." He looked at her. „You don't want this."

„I can't go home. Please."

„Come on then." He got in his car.

---

Jay looked over to the fragile girl who had fallen asleep. He had convinced her to only watch TV and maybe talk. He had convince her he didn't want to use her like that. As he turned off the TV he glanced at the girl again. Slowly he took her into his arms and carried to his bed. He would sleep on the couch tonight.

---

Emma woke up to the familiar sound of her cell phone. She looked through her pockets, finally finding what she was looking for. _Snake_. It read. „Hello?"

„_Emma, it's one in the morning! Where are you?" Snake yelled._

„I um..." Emma didn't know what to say. „I'm at..."

„_Where, Emma? Please tell me!"_

„I can't." Emma whispered. „I'll be home in 30 minutes." She hung up and walked to Jay's living room. She saw the boy asleep on the couch. She shook him weakly. „Jay... Take me home... Jay!"

„Mh?" The boy woke up slowly. Emma repeated her sentence. „Of course." He got up from the couch. „Let's go."

---

„Snake, I want to sleep." Emma whined as her step dad grabbed her arm.

„Not before you tell me where you were." Snake insisted with a sigh. How was he going to raise a girl who didn't even consider him as her father.

„I was at..." She looked down. As she whispered the end of the sentence, Snake couldn't believe it. Jay.

„Jay?" Snake questioned. Emma nodded as a response. „Why him? Emma, he's a criminal."

„He's just a friend!" Emma protested. „He's good to me." Snake glared at her. Good? Jay? Maybe to someone, but not to Emma Nelson. „May I go now?" She asked, not even waiting for a response. She marched down the stairs, slamming the door behind. _How_ exactly was Snake going to raise her?


	3. Someone

**A/N: Sorry for the lack of updates! I'm trying to update all my stories now so if you're reading anything else from me, look for updates!**

_Disclaimer- I do not own anything but this story._

**Chapter 3:**** Someone.**

Emma hated living with Snake. Since her mom died, it had been hell. Snake was depressed and sometimes verbally aggressive. They would yell at each other at home for hours. Emma had missed a few weeks from school when Snake started to make her go to school. He would do anything to get her there. He wanted her to finish her 10th grade. Missing wouldn't help, now would it? Emma kept her night life even though Snake had made her promise him she won't see Jay anymore. Emma didn't care. She needed _something_. She needed Jay. She needed someone to take her pain away and Jay was that _someone_.

"Emma." Jay sighed he opened the door. "What are you doing here? It's five in the morning. Want Snake to find out? The school is in three hours."

"Let me come in." Emma looked at the boy. Her voice had become colder in the past month. Jay could see her dark and cold side come out as there were no smiling and soft voices anymore. He would make himself not think about it. After all, Emma was supposed to be a toy to him. A toy he had picked out like a five year old. A toy he _had_ to get. But he knew in the back of his mind that she, Emma, wasn't a toy anymore. She became a girl. One girl. She became something more _special_ to him ever since he first spoke her name. Emma. Not Greenpeace or Nelson. No. It was Emma. "Jay… Don't you have parents?" Jay was surprised. She came here for that?

"I- what?" He looked at the girl.

"Parents. Your parents. Where are they?" Emma whispered.

"I don't live with them. They pay some of the bills though. My job doesn't pay much."

"Why aren't you with them?" He could hear softness in her voice now. He was _not_ going to be her cause, her crusade, if she was thinking that.

"'Cause my dad hit me." Jay said while sitting down on the couch. Emma looked up. She shouldn't have asked. She shouldn't have come here for that.

"I'm sorry." Emma whispered. "I didn't want to disturb you. Go back to sleep. I'll walk home."

"It's freezing out there." Jay said. Even though it was April, Jay was right. "Let me put something on."

"Thank you." Emma said while in the car. She placed a kiss on Jay's cheek before getting out of the car. Jay was that _someone_ for her. She was sure of it.


	4. Fuck you, Hogart

**A/N: Hey! Sorry I didn't upload sooner but we were in Finland with my family. I really needed to go there, sorry. And we didn't have internet there, so I really couldn't update, or could I? I know this chapter is short; I'm kinda having a writer's block on this story. I have to pull myself together (LOL) and update more often, I know. Enjoy the chapter!**

_Disclaimer- I do not own anything but this story. The characters and the show are owned by Epitome Pictures. Only the idea is mine._

**Chapter 4: Fuck you, Hogart.**

Jay was utterly confused. What was it with Emma? Of course, her mom had died and all that. But what had it got to do with _Jay's_ parents? He met with his mom once a month as she brought money to him so he could pay bills. He wasn't really _that_ poor. His family, that is. But he wouldn't go back 'home' even if he was paid to do that. His father had taught him a lot of bad things. Because of him, he drank and smoked. But never, ever was he going to beat up a girl, a woman, a child of any sex. With guys, older guys, who were about 16 to whatever and hung out with him, it was different. Of course they had fights. Every guy would have fights while he's 16. At least any guy like him.

Back to parents. Snake. First of all, what kind of name _is_ that, anyway? As he drove away from the Nelson-Simpson household, he could imagine Snake, Simpson, however you call him; yell at Emma, because the basement light had been on. He knew he was a 'badboy' but they hadn't really _done_ anything. She only asked about his parents. That was it. Besides, lately, Emma had been the pressuring one and Jay the one who was saying 'no'.

He smirked at that. It faded as he realized something. _He_ had made Emma like that. He was _supposed_ to make Emma… _Shine_ again or something. He was supposed to make her _happy _again. Because of all what had happened to Rick. But, the reality was, he made her even sadder and depressed.

_Fuck you, Hogart._


	5. Manny and mom

„Santos." Jay put on his trademark smirk as she approached her. The girl turned around, annoyed. Emma, who was with Manny, mouthed _what the hell?_ To him as he dragged Manny away from Emma.

"What the hell is your problem?" Emma shouted at him. "Let her go!"

"I will, E- Greenpeace. Don't worry." Jay smirked as they disappeared around the corner. "Now…"

"_What_ do you want from me?!" Manny practically yelled at him.

"Listen." His smirk faded. "Don't let Em- Nelson go out tonight. Or, when you're both out, don't let her leave. Wherever she _needs_ to go and that until she doesn't wanna go anymore."

"Why? Where is she going? What will happen to her? _Jay! _Tell me, I'm her best friend!" Manny whined.

"I bet she'll tell you soon enough." Jay said before walking away.

---

"Hey, I brought DVDs!" Manny cheered when the Nelson-Simpson household door opened. "Oh... Mr. S…"

"It's great you brought those. I guess Em will be happier then. Maybe." Snake let her in. "… Hopefully…" He shouted to Emma that Manny had come.

"What are you doing here?" Emma put on a plastic smile as she came upstairs from the basement.

"I brought DVDs!" Manny cheered like before.

"I'll let you two watch those, then. I'm at Joey's." Snake left with a hurry.

---

"Manny, did Jay tell you to do this?" Emma asked after a while as _Corpse Bride_ was running. Manny pretended not to hear. "He did, didn't he?"

"And you're having sex with him, aren't you?" Manny spat.

"Did he tell you that?" Emma asked. Manny shook her head. "Then I'm not, or am I?"

"But-" Manny glared at her. "Where were you supposed to go tonight?" Emma turned away.

"I can't believe him…" Emma gritted her teeth as she stood up. Manny pulled her back. "Wanna come, too?"

"Emma, what has _happened_ to you?!"

"Nothing!" Emma yelled. "Let me go! I need to _talk_ to him! Last night we talked. The night before we watched TV. We haven't had sex for… I don't know!" She pulled her hand back and ran out of the house.

---

"What is wrong with you?!" Emma yelled as Jay's apartment door was opened. But… it wasn't him. Was it his mom?


	6. I need you

**A/N: Yayy I'm updating! Wow, it's been three weeks since I last updated. I hope you'll enjoy this chapter. And right now, I've got no idea where this is actually going. But I'll figure that out soon enough… Maybe… Hopefully… Oh well… Enjoy!**

_Disclaimer- I do not own Degrassi or its characters. They are owned by Epitome pictures._

_**Chapter 6: I need you.**_

„Excuse me?" The woman asked.

"Oh uh… I'm so sorry, that was meant for Jay, I was…" Emma faded off as she saw a smile growing on the woman's voice.

"It's okay. My son is not the best person, I imagine." She sighed while smiling. _So she is Jay's mother. _Emma thought.

"Is Jay here?" Emma finally managed to say. Just then Jay walked out of the bathroom with only a towel on. "Hey." Her voice melted. Jay just had to smirk.

"I heard yelling?" He questioned.

"Yes! Of course! About that!" Emma was angry again. "Who do you think you are? Going on telling Manny, who's my _best friend_, that we're ha-" She shut up when she got a glare from Jay.

"I guess I'll better go." His mother hugged him and left. Emma smirked.

"It's not funny." Jay felt embarrassed.

"Yeah, it's not!" Emma yelled out again. "How could you tell her that?!" 

"I didn't tell her anything!"

"You told her to keep an eye on me! I think that's enough for her to understand!" Emma yelled, took a pillow from the couch and threw it at him. He threw it back. "Ow! You-you idiot!"

"Well I'm sorry! I don't want you to get hurt!" Jay shouted out. Emma lowered her right hand that was about to slap him. "Yeah, that's right." Emma still stared at him in shock. "Your mom died, Emma. The last thing you need is sex." He sat down on the couch, sighing as he did. "Look… I think you should leave."

"Jay…" Emma whispered. "I just can't… without you. You talk to me. You're there." Jay was about to say something but Emma continued before he could. "And it's not like that with Manny. I mean, she listens but in the end, it still ends up about her." Jay smirked. "She's just like that. And right now I need someone like… you. Someone different."

"Way too different." Jay made a point. "We had sex."

"Yeah, but…" Emma faded off. She looked down and whispered. "I need you."


	7. Idiot

**A/N: Wow, it has been what, 2 months since I last updated? So sorry my dear readers! You know I'm hopeless… Enjoy!**

**Influences- This chapter was influenced by the songs sang by the band Mr. Children.**

_Disclaimer- I do not own Degrassi or its characters. They are owned by Epitome Pictures._

_**Chapter 7:**__** Idiot.**_

"The last thing you need is me. Trust me." Jay grabbed his car keys from a table. "Let's go."

"No!" Emma protested. "I'm not going back there. I don't want to. I want to stay here." She crossed her arms as she glared at Jay. "I won't go." Jay raised an eyebrow as he opened the door.

"I'll carry you out of here if I have to. It's my apartment. You don't have any right to be here if I don't want you to." He said as he was approaching her. As he tried to grab Emma by her wrists, she jumped away from him. "Come on now. You were with Santos, right? She's waiting."

"I don't think so." Emma spat out quietly even though she was sure that Manny was waiting for her, worrying about her in her house while the Corpse Bride was singing a song about why the man she loved didn't like her the way she was. "Can't I stay over? Just for tonight? Please?" She whispered softly. She could see Jay roll his eyes.

"You'll act any way you need to in a situation. First, you're rude and then you're a goody-goody." He sighed. "And no, you can't. I don't want you here anymore. Ever again. And I don't want you in the van, either." The seriousness and harshness of his words made Emma surprised and hurt.

"Wh-why?" She whispered while looking down. "I-I didn't do anything… I-… If it's about what I said just now, I'm sorry. It-It's fine if you have no feelings whatsoever… I don't like you like that… I just… Nee-" He was cut off by a _no_.

"No." He said once again. "It's not about that, alright? Let's just go now. I'll drive you home and then you'll be nothing to me and I'll be nothing to you. Like it was last year. We can even go back to hating, if you want." He smirked weakly after saying that but his smirk wasn't responded with one. "Look…" He watched as Emma moved past her. She was almost out of the door when he grabbed her back. "Don't make it like this." He hissed. "Let's go now, I'll drive you."

"I don't need a scumbag like you driving me!" She yelled out but her eyes were smiling mockingly, as if to shout _I got you!_ Soon, a smirk lingered on her lips, also. Jay smirked widely and let go of her. After motioning with his hands that she was free to go, he watched her rush away. When Emma reached the bottom of the stairs, she burst out crying. _Jay doesn't know me at all._ She thought as she was running home. _He can't even tell when I'm lying. He's an idiot._


	8. New Years Eve

**A/N: First of all – I'm an idiot! Jay almost drove Emma home with nothing but a towel on?! What was I thinking?! LOL. But here's the next chapter, I hope you'll like it.**

**Influences- I can't remember the songs. I was influenced by some guys in my class, too, though. They made me listen to my iPod because of their yelling, LOL.**

_Disclaimer- I do not own Degrassi or its characters. They are owned by Epitome Pictures._

_**Chapter 8: New Years Eve**_

A month had passed. Christmas had passed quickly and now it was January 31. Emma and Jay hadn't met even once, unless you count several eye contacts in school. "I'm…" She looked up as she almost walked into him in the street. "Sorry."

"It's fine." Jay added quietly and moved past her, leaving her looking after him. She finally gathered her confidence together and shouted at him.

"How was your Christmas?" She questioned. The question made Jay turn around and look at her. Emma could see him shrug casually._Jay-likely._ Emma corrected herself in her mind with a hidden smile. After getting the same question she had asked from Jay, she looked down. After shrugging, she looked up again. "I'm an idiot." There was a crack in her voice as she said the sentence quietly, a crack that seemed to warn for the tears that were going to come unless they changed the topic.

"Why?" Jay now approached her.

"On the night of Christmas, my throat was killing me and all, so Snake finally took me to the doctor's. It took forever to explain that it wasn't you." Emma said quietly. She read confusedness from Jay's face as she knew she hadn't told him everything there was. "I got some… thing. Because I'm an idiot." The tears rolled down her cheeks. "And because you're an idiot. Y-you made me leave, so…"

"You went down on a stranger?" He raised an eyebrow. Emma could hear mocking in his voice. It made her feel like she had been desperate after Jay left her. Although the street was almost empty, two old women had heard Jay's sentence and were now whispering.

"Would you shut up?!" Emma yelled at them as the old women got closer to them, still whispering. "I hate old people, you're such hypocrites!" The women now looked shocked and walked away as fast as they could. Jay laughed briefly. "What?" Emma muttered as she was wiping her tears away. "It's true."

"It is, but I didn't expect you to yell at them." He laughed again, after placing a smirk on his lips. "You're stupid, Greenpeace." Emma looked into his eyes.

"What?" She was taken back with Jay's last sentence. She looked down and back up again after thinking of what to say. "It was only once, anyway." She spat out the dumbest sentence ever that made Jay rolled his eyes. "And we didn't have real sex." Emma turned around to walk away, but was spun around by Jay.

"But besides the hospital?"

"Nothing special." She shrugged weakly. "I was about to meet my friends now, so bye."

"Em, there you are!" Manny ran up to her. "With Jay… What is he doing here?"

"I accidentally walked into him." Emma put on a weak smile. "Let's go now. Everyone's waiting."

"Yeah, and JT is…" Manny chattered on as Emma looked at Jay before walking towards the Dot. "Look who I got here, finally!" Manny walked into the Dot with Emma. JT, Liberty and Toby were laughing at something as they greeted Emma and made room for her and Manny. "So, how are we celebrating New Years Eve tonight?" Manny asked immediately.

"I have an idea." Chris walked up to them. "You'll get pregnant, Nelson will get a disease and the others will watch. How does that sound?" His friends laughed while Emma tried to leave. She was pulled back by Manny.

"Come on. Don't let them bug you. I've been through this, too." Manny insisted. Emma let out a defeated sigh as she sat back at the table beside Manny and Toby.

"How about DVDs at Emma's?" Liberty put up. "Danny would annoy us to death if we're at my house. And at Toby's there's Ashley, JT's house is small and Manny has her dad."

"Yeah, we could do that." Manny nodded excitedly. "We don't need anything big, anyway, right?" Emma shrugged. "Oh… What about Snake?"

"He'll be at Joey's after you'll promise him I'm not going out." Emma muttered. "I hate him; he's so annoying since mom died." Her friends looked at her as she said her last sentence so easily. "What?" She finally questioned. "It has been two months; can't I say she's dead if she is?" No one answered. "You know what? I don't want to watch your stupid DVDs. I don't need to celebrate." She spat as she walked out of the Dot.


	9. Knock Knock

**A/N: Hi! So it's time for another chapter. But I'm kinda sad, you know… If no one reviews, how can I be sure that you like this story? Enjoy the new chapter, though.**

**Influences- "Just Feel Better" by Santana feat. Steven Tyler (from Aerosmith).**

_Disclaimer- I do not own Degrassi or its characters. They are owned by Epitome Pictures._

_**Chapter 9: Knock Knock**_

Manny heard yelling coming from the Nelson-Simpson house as she approached it.

"_You can go! I'll be fine!" Emma whined desperately._

"_Not until Manny gets here, alright?" Snake sounded tired of yelling, yet he didn't give up._

"_What is wrong with you?! I'm not like that anymore!" Manny could hear her best friend fighting with tears as she was yelling at her step-dad._

"Knock knock?" Manny decided to open the door without really knocking. "Hey Em." Emma and Snake stared at her. "What?" She let out a brief and nervous chuckle. "I thought me and Emma would be alone…"

"Yeah. You will be. As long as you won't go anywhere."

"Snake!" Emma started.

"It's fine, we'll be right here when you come back." Manny promised as she started to take her coat off.

"Alright, then…" Snake grabbed his coat, scarf and hat before walking out of the house. Emma sighed out loud.

"Thanks, you're a life saver." She said to Manny who only smiled weakly. "And, I'm sorry for being like that in the Dot."

"We were just surprised. We didn't think you were over it. Not yet." Manny offered. "Can I stay?" Emma smiled back at her.

"Of course." She said warmly. "Let's call the others, too."

---

The next day when Snake came home, he found the five teenagers sleeping on the couch and on the floor. The TV screen was light blue; the last DVD had ended a long time ago. He smiled weakly as he turned off the TV and looked at the kids he was teaching. Emma woke up just as Snake was about to go upstairs. "Hi." Emma made him jump. She giggled quietly as he turned around. "Hi." She repeated.

"Hi." Snake smiled. "How was the night?"

"Good, I guess." Emma shrugged her shoulders as she looked down. "I'm sorry, you know… Is it so wrong that I coped like that? I know what I did around Christmas was, but…" She looked at Snake. "I did like Jay." She whispered. Snake sighed and turned around to go up the stairs. "Just tell me!" Emma pleaded.

"Your mom was 14 when she got pregnant." Snake said with his back facing Emma. "You're great and if she would've had an abortion you wouldn't be here, but I don't want you to get pregnant this young." With that, he finally walked up the stairs.

"Em? You alright?" Manny had heard their talk. "He's right, you know."

"Yeah, I know!" Emma agreed. "I… Did you hear everything?"

"That you like Jay?" Manny asked quietly.

"I don't anymore." Emma said confidently. "I think." She added quietly. "But he told me off so it's over."


	10. I miss him

**A/N: Merry belated Christmas and a happy belated New Year! Hope you all had an amazing one! The holidays got me busy, sorry about that. But I'm back with a new chapter for this story!**

_Disclaimer- I do not own Degrassi or its characters. They are owned by Epitome Pictures._

_**Chapter 10: I miss him**_

_I miss him._ She decided on the fifth of January. She left home after putting on her coat and walked towards his apartment. Just as she started to climb up the stairs, she faced Jay. "Emma?" He frowned as he stopped in his tracks.

"Hi." Emma felt tiny. She felt like he saw right through her, and she hated that feeling. Jay made her vulnerable.

"What are you doing here?" He asked.

"It doesn't matter, you were going somewhere." Emma started to leave but felt a strong hand on her right arm.

"I was thinking of going, but I changed my mind." Jay sighed. Emma turned around and looked at him with curiosity. "Not because of you. You know I hated my dad." 

"Hated?" Emma frowned in confusion. "You don't, anymore? Has he changed? Is he… normal, now?" Emma wasn't sure if _normal _was the right word to use but she couldn't find another word that would fit a person who has stopped being abusive. Jay rolled his eyes and let out a small, dry chuckle.

"Like he'd ever." He made a remark. "Fortunately I don't have to think whether he hurts anyone anymore." Jay saw Emma grow even more confused. "He died. Car accident."

"Oh. I'm-"

"Sorry?" Jay rolled his eyes once again. "Don't be." Emma looked down. "Let's talk about why you're here." As Emma looked up, she saw Jay smirking. She shrugged. "Missed me?" She looked down for a second, just to look back up and nod. "My ego will go too high when you're around me." He smirked widely. Emma looked offended.

"I hate you." She decided stubbornly, but didn't make a move to leave.

"Yeah right." He laughed briefly. "Wanna come upstairs? I could use a little cheering up, even if I hated the guy." Jay smirked while talking about his father.

"You should go." Emma said quietly. "To the funeral. You should go."

"No. I shouldn't." He's voice turned icy in a second. "I don't need to go. I hated him."

"I can come with you." Emma offered. "Come on, Jay! Five minutes. Please do this?" She pleaded him with desperation that was unknown and unexplainable for him.

"Fine. Five minutes." Jay sighed.

---

"James Hogart was a simple man…" They listened to the priest.

"Who used to beat up his son." Jay finished the sentence in a whisper. Emma looked at him and then down. "Great. My mom's coming." Emma searched for her mother, finally spotting her coming towards them. "Almost the whole crowd consists of drunks." Jay looked around. "At least some of them have sobered up."

"You came." His mother smiled weakly. She looked surprised when she saw Emma.

"I made him come." Emma explained.

"Yeah. And I think five minutes is over now. Bye." Jay went outside. Emma tried to follow him but she was held up by Jay's mother.

"Thanks." She said simply. "You're good to him."

"I'm just a girl who had sex with him when I faced a school shooting and when my mom died." Emma whispered. Jay's mother's expression changed quickly. "He offered it." Emma shrugged and rushed after Jay.


End file.
